Writing on her blog, Tamara Harvey asks the question, “Where was God when my 19-year-old son Logan died from severe bleeding and broken bones hours after he slammed his truck into a tree? I think God went on vacation that summer morning and left no miracles behind, at least not for Logan and me. Against my will, my soul was deposited on the grief trail, a journey no parent should ever have to experience… God was clearly absent, checked out and I felt utterly on my own.”
Where was God when Logan died? That question, “Where was God when?” is one that many people have asked in tragic circumstances.
Tamara goes on to say that then one day on social media, she saw one of those typical inspirational quotes of the day that ended with, “Know all things work together for good.” She writes, “Obviously, someone who didn’t experience true loss posted this, and I thought, ‘What good could come out of my son’s death?’”
However when she looked into it further, she discovered that the man who wrote that was Lloyd Braswell, another bereaved parent. Braswell was a pastor who himself had lost two of his four children, one of them being his 18 year old son Matthew, who had committed suicide. So she contacted Braswell and asked him, “Where was God at the time Matthew died?” He replied to her saying that he believed, “God was right there with Matthew and I believe God also had a broken heart.”
Braswell’s reply reminded me of the verse in the Bible: “God has said, ‘Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.’” And his response to Tamara also reminded me of something I had read some time ago. It was about a man who lost his teenaged son in a tragic accident and in his anguish, the man cried out, “Where was God when my son died?!?!” His Christian friend replied, “The same place He was when His own Son died.”
We all remember Jesus’ crucifixion and how He cried out in anguish, “My God, My God, why have You forsaken Me?!?!?” The answer is: God was there. We know that because of what we read Peter, one of Jesus’ disciples, saying just a few short weeks after Jesus’ death and resurrection: “Men of Israel, listen to this: Jesus of Nazareth was a man accredited by God to you by miracles, wonders and signs, which God did among you through Him, as you yourselves know. This Man was handed over to you by God’s set purpose and foreknowledge; and you, with the help of wicked men, put Him to death by nailing Him to the cross.”
Note what Peter said about God’s interaction there: “This Man was handed over to you by God’s set purpose and foreknowledge.” God allowed it, even intended it. But out of that greatest of all tragedies, the greatest of all good came: because Jesus died for our sins you and I can be forgiven and go to Heaven for eternity after we die.
That then is the promise God makes to all of us about the events of our lives: He turns them into ultimate good, somehow, someway: “And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose” (Romans 8:28.)
Like Pastor Braswell, I believe the scripture that God works for our good in all situations. That comforts me very much.
To those who question the validity of that response to tragedy, I have a question: “What other option is there for looking at tragedies? What better perspective do you have to offer me, to give me comfort in my grief?”
After 50 years of being a pastor, I have not found a better answer.
